An article in USA Today talked about excuses employees give when calling in sick. One of the most outrageous excuses was: employee’s dead grandmother was being exhumed for a police investigation. What’s wrong with that? I could see wanting to be graveside when granny is exhumed, especially if she departed this world wearing the diamond ring she promised you. It also said 29% of employers checked to verify the illness. 5% had a coworker call a suspected faker. Only when everybody has a cell phone and most households don’t have a landline, does this tactic work to entrap a faker? And what if you call when the person is at the doctor? 14% drove by the employee’s home.

When we lived in Pennsylvania, we lived across the street from my husband’s boss. The time my husband got bronchitis his boss thought he was faking since he didn’t see the car in the driveway. He alerted everyone at work to my husband’s deception. What he didn’t know is right before he got sick my husband cleaned out the garage, allowing room for the car, which was there the entire time he was sick. The boss never alerted everybody to his faux pas.

I’m sure every school age child wished they had sick days. A child wakes up, looks out the window, sees a beautiful day and calls in sick. When I was in high school my friends and I celebrated the time the teachers went on strike. For us it was the answer to our prayers – an unplanned holiday.

When it snows every school kid holds their breathe hoping for a snow day. I’ve learned that in the South four inches of snow means four weeks of no school. And as any stay-at-home mom will tell you,” Your child’s vacation becomes your nightmare.” Where do you go? You can’t hide! You can’t run (your boss is clinging to your leg!) You can’t call in sick! You can’t even give the excuse that you must bear witness to granny being exhumed so you can claim the diamond ring, because granny (who’s still alive) got cabin fever and sold the ring to get away from you and the rug rats. She bought a plane ticket and is now sunning herself on a beach in Hawaii.


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